It is Less about Your Gene but More about Your Habits

“Men's natures are alike; it is their habits that separate them.”    Confucius

We all have things that we’d like to accomplish. Some people want to be fit. Others want to be good at public speaking. While some like to be skillful in art.  Modicums of people want to be successful in business.

And in spite of our best intentions, a number of us are unable to achieve those goals. Why? Our bad habits get in the way of making them a reality.

These habits repeat themselves not because we don’t desire change but because inveterate habits by their nature are compulsive and gripping. 

Since no one can rise higher than the limits of their habits, we therefore remain stuck in a valley of mediocrity due to habits like apathy and delay. 

To free yourself from the grip of these vices, let’s consider another strategy for a change: 

Suspend the end goal for a while and instead focus on changing your habits. 

For examples:

Instead of obsessing about becoming a best-selling author; establish the habit of writing one paragraph per day.

Instead of fixating on becoming the fittest person in your community; establish the habit of doing five push-ups per day.

Instead of dreaming about becoming an impressive speaker; set up the habit of learning one new vocabulary each day.

This is how to forge a new identity in personal effectiveness as the social activist, Horace Mann observes:   “Habit is a cable; (and) we weave a thread of it each day.”

It is this approach that transformed the life of Stephen Guise after wallowing in the valley of stagnation for more than ten years. He is now a successful author of the powerful book: ‘Mini-Habits:  Smaller Habits, Bigger Results.’

 Below are some thoughts from the book that are relevant to the theme of this article:

One: “We’re quick to blame ourselves for lack of progress, but slow to blame our strategies.”

Two: “A mini habit is a very small positive behavior that you force yourself to do every day.”

Three: “When you add good habits into your life, it illuminates another possible path, restores your confidence, and gives you hope.”

Here is what you need to grasp: Your success starts not when you become what you envision but it starts when you have established the habit of doing what is relevant to taking you there. 

For examples: …

Writing: It doesn’t start when you publish a book, but when you have become someone who writes habitually. 

Health and Fitness: It doesn’t start when you have the fittest form; it starts when you have become the kind of person who eats right and exercises regularly. 

Running: It doesn’t start when you finish a marathon but when you have become someone who can’t do without running. 

And as a result of this process, you will establish the inner confidence of the type of remarkable person you truly yearn to become—long before the reality is noticeable to others.

This is the secret that differentiates the best among us from the rest of us, as the British novelist, William Makepeace Thackeray said: “Successful people aren't born that way. They become successful by establishing the habit of doing things unsuccessful people don't like to do.” 

And he added that: “The successful people don't always like these things themselves; they just get on and do them.”

Now, how do you get on to do what you don’t ordinarily like to do? 

Answer: make the task so small that you can’t say no to doing it, on any day.

You see, outstanding winners in any area of life are winners not because of their special genes but because they have established certain habits to enable their success. And if we want to replicate their wins, we must take charge of our habits for the realization of our own visions.

Therefore, build the habit first and the goal will take care of itself. And as you start to remold your habit with doable, right actions for you, you will start to feel better about yourself . And when you get to this zone; it is only a matter of time for your vision to become a real thing of beauty.

This is where you get the full conviction that it is less about your gene; it is more about your habits. And with such kind of self knowledge; you can make almost anything happen.

So we need to work on our habits before we can experience any transformational change in our lives, as the English poet, John Dryden concluded: “We first make our habits, and then our habits make us.”