Golden-Rule: The Supreme Principle of Fair-Dealing

  

“Try to treat others as you would want them to treat you.”

L. Ron Hubbard

 

 

Today, we want to examine the virtue of fairness in our relationship and dealings with others.  

It is popularly called, the Golden rule: an essential principle in a civilized world of tolerance and harmony where everyone can live with everyone else gracefully and in peace.

Before I write further, permit me to quote a few thinkers’ words on the meaning of this important code of ethics.

Umar ibn Al-Khattab, (the second Rightly Guided Caliph of the Islamic Empire) said: “What you do not want for yourself, do not impose it on others.”

Hillel the Elder, the Jewish religious sage also wrote: “That which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow. That is the whole Torah; the rest is the explanation; go and learn.

Orison Swett Marden, the founder of SUCCESS magazine viewed it with the lens of business. He stated: “The golden rule for every business man is this: 'Put yourself in your customer's place.”

You see, it simply boils down to this: we should never want or demand anything from anyone else that we are not perfectly willing to accept ourselves. We should treat everyone with sufficient care and kindness just as we would like to be treated.

In his book on ‘Business Ethics,’ John Maxwell challenges us to personify this empathic principle with the following simple question:

“Every day, whenever the issue of ethical behavior confronts you, ask this question: ‘How would I like to be treated in this situation?’”  

If we adopt this principle as the integrity guideline for our lives, we will ensure that everyone in our world is treated with due respect and fairness in every transaction, every engagement and even in the resolution of any dispute.

A good life is the net result of cumulative choices that are predominantly based on wisdom and virtue. By aligning our values with the true north principles, we are taking an important step to ensuring that we are going to make the right choices of thoughts, words and actions, even when it is easier not to.

Once we decide to regulate our conduct by the golden rule of fairness and consideration for others, we would give ourselves the necessary clarity we need to act wisely in every challenging—or confusing— situation.

In the words of Edwin Markham, an American poet of Oregon: “We have committed the Golden Rule to memory; let us now commit it to life.”

Therefore, make the golden rule the integrity guideline for your life.

Set Your Goal but Focus on a Process

 

“Systems and processes are essential to keep the crusade going, but they should not replace the crusade.”_Simon Sinek

 

I have read different books on the power of goal-setting and a number of articles that stress the value of system thinking and process method to getting results and achieving success in business and life.  

Based on what I understand from my own personal study and experimentation, I conclude that both goals and systems are necessary tools in the journey of self-improvement.

Simply put, goals give us a direction to aim at so that all our efforts can be organized and purposeful. But systems and processes are essential to sustaining our efforts through thick and thin.

In the words of James Clear, the author of ‘Atomic Habits’: “Goals are good for setting a direction, but systems are best for making progress.”

For example, as an ambitious student, you need a goal if you are keen to become the valedictorian of your set but the best prediction of your eventual success will be the strength of your system: your study habits, regular class attendance and your performances on continuous assessment.

Yes, it is important to have something to shoot at. But many of the people who set goals do end up missing their targets. So, we need to add a good system to the equation if we are truly serious about realizing our vision.  

You see, when we use the two great tools properly, we are not only likely to surprise ourselves but we will keep the momentum alive, moving from success to success long after we have achieved our initial objectives.

By setting a meaningful goal, we would have excluded ourselves from wandering generalities of the masses and by designing a formidable system, we would have protected ourselves from the danger of bipolar swings of discipline and willpower.

Therefore, set your goals but commit to a process: both are indispensable tools in the actualization of human potential.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Resourcefulness Is the Greatest Resource

 
 

“Resourcefulness is the cure to failure. Successful people are resourceful and find a way to make it work. ”_Tony Robbins

 

Wherever we are right now, and whatever our past may be, I believe we still have the capacity to accomplish our dreams, if we take inspiration from remarkable stories of success that we hear about all the time.

One of such stories is that of Ev Williams who founded Blogger and co-founded Twitter and then, the successful writing platform: Medium.

He achieved such series of impressive successes despite the fact that he had to live on his friend couch at a time in his life.

He became an inspiration to millions because he had the courage to bet on himself when things were bleak and he might have personally felt like a failure.

That’s why I think resourcefulness is the greatest resource.

Another inspiring story of resourcefulness is that of J. K Rowling who turned out to be the first author in history to earn more than $1 billion from writing novels.

She somehow reached the top of the literary world even though she had to live on welfare to survive for a while. She made a remarkable lemonade out of bitter lemon because she chose resourcefulness over lamentations.

Instead of despair in the face of failure and disappointments, she chose to take charge of what was within her power. She expressed herself this way: “Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. And so rock bottom became a solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”

You see, it’s all about being resourceful. And that begins with making a decision for a change and then following that decision with firm commitment to follow-through no matter what.

Yes, we don’t control the circumstances that life deals us, but we do control the response we direct towards those circumstances.

In other words, no matter how bad things may be at the present, hopelessness and resourcefulness are two potential choices. And, it is up to no one but us to make an empowering choice.

So, I dare you to choose wisely from now onward.

Resilience

 

“Resilience is very different than being numb. Resilience means you experience, you feel, you fail, you hurt. You fall. But you keep going.”

Yasmin Mogahed

 

We all have a way of framing what we experience in life.

Some of us tend to see the cup as half-full and those are called, the optimists and others tend to see it as half-empty and those are called, the pessimists.

However, if we desire to be more resilient in our day-to-day lives, we need to actively choose optimism and do away with all brands of pessimism, even during our darkest moments of trial and tribulations.

By doing so, we would bounce back from any challenging circumstances and negative events with class and courage that will surprise not only us but also everyone around us.

In the words of an American author of ‘Resilience: Reflections on the Burdens and Gift of Facing Life’s Adversities’ Elizabeth Edwards. She defines it thus:

“Resilience is accepting your new reality, even if it's less good than the one you had before. You can fight it, you can do nothing but scream about what you've lost, or you can accept that and try to put together something that's good.”

Resilience is what enables the Bamboo tree to withstand the vicissitudes of times without breaking under the stress. With resilience, Bamboo can bend with the wind and adapt to the severest of weather conditions.

Even better than the tree and animals, we as intelligent beings have the ability to bounce back from the most difficult of times, if we have the unshakable will to thrive in the midst of chaos.

The seeds of our resilience are planted in the way we process the situations we face. Therefore, we should focus on what we can change, accept what we can’t change and make the most of the moment at hand.

In his book, ‘Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Most Challenging Days of Your Life,’ Dr. Phil aims to fuel your spirit of resilience by reminding you that:

“You can love, lose and survive. You can fall to your knees and cry in pain. You can feel a horrible, crippling emptiness, yet recover and fill yourself up again.”

 

To Develop Your Resilience, Temper Negativity with Wisdom

No matter what has happened, we can learn and grow stronger, if we have the right perspective, which is a byproduct of wisdom.

Great value can be gleaned from painful experiences, if we are wise enough to weather the storm with patience.

However, for most of us, this is not an easy thing to do. But those who are able to transcend their painful difficulties are the ones who have learned to tap from the collective wisdom of the ages in form divine wisdom or good books of principles and virtues.

Through study and contemplation, they are transformed. Now, they understand that others in the past (and even in the present) have gone through something far worse than whatever they may be facing. That is what keeps them calm and collected in the midst of their most painful moments.

In this direction, Carol Orsborn, the author of ‘Older, Wiser, Fiercer; the Wisdom Collection’ enlightens us further on the art of resilience. She writes:

“Mastering the art of resilience does much more than restore you to who you once thought you were. Rather, you emerge from the experience transformed into a truer expression of who you were really meant to be.”

You see, true resilience goes beyond surviving our painful difficulties; it includes thriving on because of those painful difficulties.

No wonder, the peak performance expert, Tony Robbins says that: “No one's life is a smooth sail; we all come into stormy weather. But it's this adversity - and more specifically our resilience - that makes us strong and successful.”

In essence, our adversities can become a real advantage, when we decide to master the art of resilience.

Tiny Steps to Audacious Goals

 

“We rise to great heights by a winding staircase of small steps.”

Francis Bacon

 

If you’re someone who frequently fails to achieve your ambitious goals, and you assume your goals are just too big to accomplish or it seems something is standing in your way, then this article is written for you.

And the premise of my message for you is that the easiest path to massive results is not the way of massive heroic efforts but the path of tiny and consistent steps.

In other words, when it comes down to achieving our audacious goals, we don’t need to sweat blood to make them happen; we only need to capitalize on the power of small but consistent wins.

Steady progress is a very powerful ally and focusing on progress, no matter how small is a clever guard against the disease of procrastination.

Contrary to the popular notion that massive effort is the best way to massive result; tiny steps are the real secret to lasting success, whether big or small as Louis Sachar, the author of ‘Wayside School series’ observes:

“It is better to take many small steps in the right direction than to make a great leap forward only to stumble backward (later).”

For example: If your goal is to reach the planet Mars (over 33,000,000 miles away), and you plan to take massive and unrelenting actions to reach it, the chances are high that you will eventually exhaust yourself with burnouts due to the sheer volume of work involved and its attendant stress.

But if you consider the path of tiny sustainable steps, chances are high that you will keep going, maintain a steady progress until you reach your astronomical target.

In the words of Sheryl Sandberg, the billionaire and COO of Facebook:

“Getting from point A to point Z can be daunting unless you remember that you don’t have to get from A to Z.

You just have to get from A to B. Breaking big dreams into small steps is the way to move forward.”

Hope you notice the point in her last sentence, the way toward progress is the path of tiny steps. The reasoning behind this is quite clear.  We need momentum to achieve big goals, and tiny series of constructive steps is a smart way to kindle the fiery fire of momentum.

In support of this concept, Ellen Langer, a professor of psychology at Harvard University observes:

“There is always a step small enough from where we are to get us to where we want to be.

If we take that small step, there's always another we can take, and eventually a goal thought to be too far to reach becomes achievable.”

Finally, know that the most natural way to achieving a big vision is the path of small, consistent steps. It is how human beings, animals and even trees grow to maturity.

It is the path that will not only make our greatest visions inevitable but also organically grow our self-confidence, self-efficacy and the belief in our personal capacity to make worthwhile things happen.

 

Tap-Tap-Tap (Day-In, Day-Out)

  

“Showing up is essential. Showing up consistently is powerful. Showing up consistently with a positive outlook is even more powerful.”_Jeff Olson

 

John Maxwell, a prolific author who has written several books on the great laws of success and irrefutable principles of leadership once said he personally wouldn’t want to be known for remarkable creativity or superhuman intelligence.

He would rather prefer to be notable for only one thing; a commitment for showing up day after day.

Now if you consider his stand somewhat ridiculous, then please read further to learn what some other masters in their fields say about this simple principle of success.

 

Woody Allen (Academy-award winning movie director) says: “Ninety percent of life is just showing up.”

 

Harvey Mackay (Author of seven New York Times best-selling books) adds: “You can beat 80% of the competition just by showing up.”

 

Stephen Hawking (Lucasian Professor of Mathematics at the University of Cambridge) concludes: “Half the battle is just showing up.”

 

I hope by now, you can see the importance of showing up, day after day. Indeed, for any serious-minded person, it is a worthy motto to live by.

And it means that when it comes to either ordinary success or extra-ordinary achievements, you don’t focus on superhuman measure of discipline you have to forge into your character but you focus on just showing up for your task every day without fail.

No wonder Paul Budnitz, founder of Kidrobot infers that: “Success is an accident. Showing up (everyday), even if it’s just for 5 minutes, makes us accident-prone.”

For your personal benefit, you should ask yourself the following two questions used by true professionals to know whether you are on track towards your big goals or not:

Do I show up everyday?

Do I show up, no matter what—especially when it is easier not to?

You can use the two question above to strengthen your identity as a truly committed person.

Any intelligent doer can achieve truly remarkable things when he decides to make showing up daily at his game a core priority.

If all we have to do is show up, then it becomes very easy to beat procrastination, which is the number one reason for failure in every walk of life.

Once we overcome procrastination, we’ll easily show up every day to perform our duties, and when we show up everyday on the things that matter, then it is only a matter of time for us to experience the big break that we desire.

Showing up on day one is just the beginning but doing it day after day is where the real power lies. In essence winning is the total sum of our meaningful efforts, repeated day in, day out.

Let me conclude this article with the wisdom of Anne Lamott, the author of, ‘Bird by Bird’ who wrote:

“Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up (day after day) and do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: You don’t give up.”

Tackle the Hardest Thing First

 
 

“It is not enough to be busy. So are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?”_Henry David Thoreau

 

Last week I wrote about one of the strategies behind the remarkable success of Elon Musk, who is CEO of not just Tesla, but also SpaceX among others innovative pursuits.

With the level of success he has achieved, he deserves our repeated study to learn as much as possible from his invaluable skills and uncommon vision.

Today, we want to glean another tip from him on how he prioritizes his work on a daily basis, which I think is one of the foremost secrets of his exceptional effectiveness.

It is perhaps one of the main reasons behind his extra-ordinary ability to execute and give form to his fantastic ideas.

If you’re interested in how he works smarter than most of us, please read on to learn his dominant tip for maximizing productivity.

He starts his day with the most critical problem he has to solve and then schedules the rest of his day strictly based on priority.

That sentence is probably the greatest productivity skill you will ever find.

And to put it another way, he tackles the hardest task first thing each day and does everything else in their true order of importance.

As the billionaire said in his commencement presentation at the University of Southern California: “Don’t waste your time on stuff that doesn’t actually make things better. Focus on signal over noise.”

To understand the practical value of that concept, we need to consider the fact that his once-struggling car company (Tesla) now has a current market capitalization of $525 billion, a staggering worth that is more than the value of both Toyota and General Motors combined.

In this direction, the author of ‘7 Habits of Highly Effective People’ Stephen Covey tells you to imbibe this critical habit by deciding “what your highest priorities are and have the courage to say ‘no’ to other things. And the way you do that is by having a bigger ‘yes’ burning inside. The enemy of the ‘best’ is often the ‘good.’”

You see, we can’t do everything within the very limited time that we have. So, it is smart to focus on the signals and ignore all the noise if we want to make the most of our short stay on earth.

Prioritizing is the key to exceptional productivity. It is how we can ensure that a thing which practically means everything is not inadvertently at the mercy of a thing which may eventually mean nothing.

Intelligent activity is different from living in a frantic state of motion. As the author of Four-Hour Work Week, Tim Ferriss observes: “If you don't have time, the truth is, you don't have priorities. Think harder; don't work harder.”

By that, he meant to remind us to think carefully and be sure that our chosen priority is actually the thing that truly matters; the thing that actually makes everything else easier.

Finally, know that you can make great things happen in your life and business when you decide to focus on the right priorities.

Therefore, to change your life for the better, you don’t need superhuman measure of self-discipline, but you do need to make a better choice of priority, going forward.