The Grass Is Greener Where It Is Being Watered

“Start where you are. Distant fields always look greener, but opportunity lies right where you are. Take advantage of every opportunity of service.”—Robert Collier

At first glance, the grass always looks greener on the other side, and as a result everyone generally wants to be in somebody else's shoes; they are tempted to think the other guy is luckier compared to them. 

However, not everything is as it seems. In this life, very few things are—for all intents and purposes—exactly like they appear to be. What you see at a far distance is rarely what you see when you get close enough. 

Moreover, when the grass is even greener on the other side, there is more to the story than you care to believe. I can assure you the other side is spending more time, energy and resources on her garden than you do.

With that said, I believe we can also choose to make our own garden lush. We can make our grass greener. We can make it as green as we truly want it to be. 

Let’s move forward to see how we can make that happen

How to Have a Lush Garden

Very simply, to make your garden lush, nurture it diligently.

If we want to have the greenest grass in town, we can. But we need to spend more time than others working in our garden, tending to it, and clearing away the weeds.  In anything, value is created through intelligent work.

We can’t rest on our laurels if we want to remain evergreen.  No matter how you define success—greener grass— it is never owned. It is rented and the rent is due everyday. 

Whether we want to become more righteous, raise decent children, have an amazing career or sustain an exemplary marriage; it’s going to require unremitting efforts.  The key to having a ‘lush garden’ in any area of focus is to keep working on the right elements of our ‘plot.’

To gain motivation on this level of self-reliance and personal responsibility, read what Ezra Taft Benson, the former American Secretary of Agriculture has to tell us. He said: 

“When you are tempted to look elsewhere for greener pastures, just remember someone else is probably looking at yours. And if another pasture looks greener, perhaps it is getting better care and attention. Grass is always greener . . . where it is watered.”

In this direction, the Persian scholar and the author of ‘Alchemy of Happiness,’ Abu Hamid Al-Ghazzali (RA) has a moral lesson to share. He related:  “As I look back on my life, I realize that every time I thought I was being rejected from something good; I was actually being redirected to something better. You must convince your heart that whatever God has decreed (for you) is most appropriate and most beneficial to you.” 

And Marcus Aurelius, the Good Roman Emperor added his own bit: “Accept whatever comes to you woven in the pattern of your destiny, for what could more aptly fit your need?”

In essence, the sages of old are reminding us that right mental attitude is necessary to get the best out of life, whatever may be our circumstances. With right mental attitude and little exertion of our limbs, we can turn rags into a robe, misfortunes into a fortune, and create an oasis in the middle of a desert.

So, if your neighbour’s garden appears greener than yours and you feel envious. You’re misdirecting your focus. Instead, adopt the key insight of the wise: The grass is not always greener on the other side. It is always greener where it is being watered.

Now change your mental attitude from negative to positive. Choose to always nurture your own ‘plot’ to the best of your ability and you won’t have the time for envy, jealousy and complaint.

Going forward, decide to always mind your own business. Decide to always water your own grass; the grass is always greener where it is always being watered.

You Can Remake Yourself

“If you are going to achieve excellence in big things, you must develop the habit in little matters. Excellence is not an exception, it is a prevailing attitude.”_ Colin Powell

Whether we yearn to learn a new skill, build a great business or raise a pious family, the one thing that will determine our success or failure, more than our intentions and talks, is our actions—our habits. 

We do not become what we wish, we become what we do. That is why the historian, Will Durant once said, “We are what we repeatedly do.” The wellspring of our identity and results is our regular action. 

Therefore, you can make yourself better by acting better. You can make yourself highly productive by doing better, and you can make yourself more generous by giving more, as the ancient Greek philosopher, Aristotle mentioned long ago that: “To be is to do.” And he expanded his aphorism further when he added: “Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts.” 

On the concept of habit, Charles Duhigg, the author of, ‘ The Power of Habit’ argues that the key to being more effective, and achieving greater level of success lies in harnessing the power of habit to transform our lives. He reveals to us an interesting point through his book. He writes:

“Champions don’t do extraordinary things. They do ordinary things, but they do them without thinking. They follow the habits they’ve learned.” In other words, champions do ordinary things in an extraordinary way due to the strength of their habits.

However, habits can be a curse or a blessing. Our habits will do us the most good if they are predominantly wholesome but they will do us sufficient harm if they are predominantly poor. 

So, to succeed at anything, according to the habit expert, Charles Duhigg, all you need to do is learn and adopt the right habits. And he contends that there is no such thing as an incorrigible. He argues that with patient effort, anyone can change any unwholesome habit. Duhigg explains:

“Change might not be fast and it isn't always easy. But with time and effort, almost any habit can be reshaped.”

Now, let’s decide to discard our bad habits and create good ones that will add great value to our lives. Ali (RA), the Fourth Rightly Guided Caliph of the Islamic Empire defined this as character development. He said: “Virtue is overcoming one’s (bad) habit.”

In conclusion, if we learn and practice the right habits, it is only a matter of time before we become a symbol of excellence in any area that we choose.

Live a Life of Meaningful Purpose

“True happiness is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.”_ Helen Keller

All great people are not drifters, but they are men of great purpose.

Men of purpose don’t live their lives by a muddle default—as the general mass of people do. They utilize their waking hours intelligently toward achieving a meaningful goal. 

Great minds understand in depth the insight of an American social reformer, Charles Henry Parkhurst, who said: “Purpose is what gives life meaning.” In other words, living for something meaningful is what separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom.

And we can cite Einstein’s example as someone who lived for a worldly purpose. He chose to direct all his energies to the pursuit of how the physical world works. He sought to comprehend how light travels. Consequently he revealed to us the powerful theory of relativity.

However, to make that discovery, the ambitious scientist worked and thought continuously on the concept for more than ten years. It is no small feat to remain committed to a task that pays no immediate reward, year in, year out for up to a full decade. 

Great people know how to stay the course of purpose, no matter how long it takes. This is how they leave a lasting impact on the pages of history. On this, the British Statesman, Benjamin Disraeli did assert that: “The secret of success is constancy of purpose.”

The theory of relativity is now one of the arcs of modern physics simply because Einstein was a dreamer who dared to live for a useful purpose, in worldly terms. 

To maximize our potential, we must think of something worthy to commit ourselves to.  And the great thinker, James Allen also counseled us to: “Be of single aim; have a legitimate and useful purpose and devote yourself unreservedly to it.”

So, decide today to aspire for something fitting of your best, something bigger than yourself and dedicate your life to it. Set your goals tall enough, and never stop striving to hit them. This is the way to make the most of your one single sojourn on our transitory planet earth. 

In the words of Mitch Albom, the international bestselling author of “The Five People You Meet”: “The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”

Finally, I humbly conclude that the ultimate purpose of life has less to do with enjoying copious personal comfort but more to do with living rightly by adhering to the Laws of our Creator, being useful to others, and fighting for a good cause that will benefit many generations yet to be born. 

This is not only the source of true fulfillment in this world but also the means to eternal felicity in the otherworld.

Self-Confidence: It Is Earned by Taking Action

“The reputation you have with yourself - your self-esteem - is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life.”—Nathaniel Branden

If you lack confidence and you have been running yourself down for a while, it is time to overturn the tide. 

Learn and apply the tip to becoming more confident and see what happens in your life.

Confidence is the inner believe in your ability to win out of anything you are confronted with. This core faith can come from the fact that you have done very well before in handling something similar—or something equally challenging.

Confidence is the knowing that if we could manage to succeed at one time before, we can invariably try and succeed again, this time, as James Allen writes in his classic book, ‘As a Man Thinketh’ that: 

“The will to do springs from the knowledge that we can do.” 

We earn confidence through action. Regular action, however small is a great builder of self-esteem. Therefore, the secret to earning confidence is to do and succeed at something first. And the way to guarantee that foundational success is to cut our coat according to our size. 

We can only win when we believe we will win; we can’t achieve what we don’t truly believe we can accomplish. So to be sure of success, set a goal that is fairly easy for you to reach, reach it, and then repeat the process over and over again, increasing the scope of your dare, a little bit, each time. And as you do, your confidence will grow.

When you act the part, you become the part. Success builds confidence and confidence in turn builds success. This powerful feedback loop is what great people understand and employ to rise above the commonplace. 

And Mark Victor Hansen, the author of ‘the Chicken Soup for the Soul,’ inspires you to get in the game when he writes:  “Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident.” 

Finally, what one area do you think you can direct your effort to start improving your confidence, going forward? This is after all, the bottom line of your search.

It is About Focus

“The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus.”—Bruce Lee

The most productive people are not superhuman at all, they are red blooded creations like you and me. However, they have thoroughly imbibed some valuable qualities to get to the top of their game. One of such qualities of effective living is focus. As you may have heard, focus is literally power. And this is the theme of my writing today.

For us to achieve extra-ordinary results, we have to know how we can focus on what matters the most in whatever we are involved with. From ample evidences and many life examples, winning has less to do with great intelligence but more to do with laser focus. Focus is more important IQ. As the martial legend, Bruce Lee rightly put it, the average man with a sharp focus is the successful warrior.

By the same token, to become successful warriors in our own fights, Timothy Ferriss, bestselling author of The 4-Hour Work Week urges us to “Focus on the important few and ignore everything else.” 

Without question, to succeed big in life, we need to have focus. The reason most of us struggle to unleash our potential is because we never really focus our lives; we have shallow understanding of the incredible power that we can instantly command when we concentrate our attention on one great aim.

Focusing is the real secret to remarkable achievements of the vital few. And the founder of Apple Inc, Steve Jobs totally agreed to this in his life and his words. He said:

“That's been one of my mantras - focus and simplicity. Simple can be harder than complex: You have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. But it's worth it in the end because once you get there, you can move mountains.”

To put a ding in your universe, what you need to do is simple: focus on the essentials and eliminate everything else.